This Was NOT in the 'Brochure'

Updated: Mar 30, 2021

Once upon a time, there was a fairly intelligent girl who thought she knew it all, and had it all. And then well quite simply … LIFE occurred.  It felt like overnight (but really was prolonged over a MUCH longer period) that her world was pulled apart. Dismantled. Rug pulled from under her. Reality smack bang in the face! Woah! Yep, SHIT got real … real fast.

You see… she was travelling along ‘the path’. She didn’t get into trouble, studied hard, obeyed her parents, forged friendships, got a degree or two, started a career.

Her long-term steady relationship turned into marriage, a house or two, a dog or two, a kid, another degree, another house, a boat, some cars, another kid, smattered with holidays, parties, and lots of people around … you know just doing LIFE. 

Doing what was expected? Maybe. Ticking boxes? Perhaps.

Living an authentic fulfilled life? Definitely not!

Then in a blink of an eye. Ready for it? He says,


She says “You’re leaving?”.

BAM…. Right in the stomach and between the eyes…SIMULTANEOUSLY! Absolutely sideswiped, blind sided and hit for a six all at once.

When you reflect on what ensued, it can quite simply be described as a series of “this wasn’t in the brochure” moments. 

So, I welcome you on a journey of discovery (P.S. its still going, and probably always will). Some of these will be mine, and some of these are my people’s stories…. but what matters most is it appears that none of us seem to have gotten that darn brochure.  You know the one? The one that tells us what life will be like, what we can expect, how things are going to turn out.  The stuff that we can (or maybe more likely, thought we could) rely on.

So you know what I have discovered? There may or may not ACTUALLY be a brochure!!! I know, right? Seriously!!!! WTF. Why the hell not? Surely someone has a copy and it's not an urban myth?

But you know what I have decided I am going to do about that … I am going to write it.  For you, for me, for everyone. Because if I have learned anything navigating this crazy, messy thing called life; is that I was born, and made of the stuff, to just get SHIT done! And as I write it, I am going to share it with you each step of the way! Not make you wait for the final, proof read and edited glossy copy. But the raw, truth-filled, red-pen marked draft that will help you now as you battle in the trenches.

And you can read it from afar and nod saying ‘yup, been there’ or you can write and tell me about what brochure you need. And the sisterhood will deliver. This, I promise you!

To get you started on working through this process I encourage you to pick a mantra (or thirty seven). Your motto. Your catch-cry. Your everyday reminder when the path gets tricky.  In case you are having trouble I am happy to share mine with you… because although they are used, I can tell you they have proven success. These were the building blocks of getting me started… what I want, what I value, what I stand for and most of all who I will always be. Write them down somewhere that you catch a glimpse of them often, or chant them at the top of your lungs. Whatever works for you!!!

* I can and I will.

* No matter how you feel; get up, dress up, show up and never give up.

* I’ve got this!

* I am not a victim.  I will hold my head high.  This will not define me.

* Everything will be ok in the end. If it’s not ok, it’s not the end.

P.S. I hope you enjoy them, I hope they help you… but they are just the beginning! Because now I will write 'the brochure'.

Danielle, when not writing, can be found wrangling her league of two girl superheroes-in-training, a Goldendoodle prone to separation anxiety, and helping to save the world one client at a time as a Rehabilitation Counsellor.

Following years of living a ‘tick the boxes’ life, the rug was pulled out from under her when her marriage broke down. What ensued can quite simply only be described as a series of “this wasn’t in the brochure” moments.

So as she continues of her own journey of self-discovery, she has decided to take matters into her own hands and write a new style of brochure for all the others out there. One that is kind of a guide to life, love and parenting which is not sugar-coated.

Her aim is to help other parents by providing a real and raw approach to navigating this crazy, messy thing called life.